Kilroy's kangaroo testicles and Spanish practices...

Robert Kilroy Silk - who faced a storm a couple of months ago when he was paid to appear on 'I'm a Celebrity' at the same time as collecting generous wages to represent us as Euro-MP for the East Midlands - is clearly finding it tough to survive the economic downturn.

He's apparently been forced to advertise his luxury Spanish villa for rent - for a cool £12,750 a fortnight.

If you want 'extras' like air-con for your stay at Permatan's Pad, that will cost you another £250.

And to squeeze every penny, you can even get a map of the local area thrown in for another four quid. What a cheek.

Wonder how much extra he charges for his sun-beds?

So why is he trying to rent out his villa, which rather ironically is said to be a former olive mill (no, honestly!).

Well, locals say Kilroy is rarely seen there. Critics of course would say he's rarely seen at the Euro-Parliament either where he reportedly misses at least half the votes, attracting derision in such publications as Private Eye.

In fact, few have seen Kilroy in the East Midlands, never mind the Euro-Parliament since the good people of Erewash in Derbyshire rejected his vain bid to become their MP in the 2005 General Election - see photo.

Which was an even bigger humiliation to his ego than becoming the first 'celeb' to be booted out of the jungle when the former MP and sacked chat-show host attempted to relaunch his TV career before Christmas...

I loved the comment from Labour's Glenis Willmott at the time. Glenis suggested that Kilroy was elected to represent the people of the East Midlands, not parade in an Australian jungle chewing kangaroo testicles!

Kilroy wasn't here...

It seems no-one at the European Parliament will miss Robert Kilroy Silk while he attempts to relaunch his failed TV career tonight on the nonsense that is 'I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here'.

His 'colleagues' from across the political divide agree he's so rarely in Brussels that another few weeks absence won't make much difference.

Kilroy's promised big changes when he was elected as a UKIP MEP to represent the good folk of the East Midlands in the Euro-Parliament in a blaze of self-made glory almost four years ago, but it's proved to be all bluster.

I've only met Kilroy once and it was an unpleasant experience. Our paths crossed in Northampton on the night the votes in the Euro election were counted. As he brushed past us ordinary people - and a queue of MPs and MEPs standing patiently in line to gain entry to the count - he demonstrated all his legendary rudeness and arrogance.

Of course, Kilroy soon fell out with UKIP when his coup to become its Leader collapsed in farce. So he formed his own party and looked around for a target seat to launch his bid to return to Westminster.

He picked on Erewash in Derbyshire, but Kilroy badly misjudged sitting MP Liz Blackman. I know Liz and in contrast to Kilroy, she is one of the quietest, and most hard-working parliamentarians anyone could ever wish to meet.

Liz sensibly let Kilroy grab the headlines while she continued doing what she does best - working hard for her constituents.

Far from beating Liz, she actually increased her majority and Kilroy was suitably humiliated. For me, the Erewash result was the sweetest of the night.

Let's hope Kilroy doesn't choke on his wombat testicles...eh?