Kilroy wasn't here...

It seems no-one at the European Parliament will miss Robert Kilroy Silk while he attempts to relaunch his failed TV career tonight on the nonsense that is 'I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here'.

His 'colleagues' from across the political divide agree he's so rarely in Brussels that another few weeks absence won't make much difference.

Kilroy's promised big changes when he was elected as a UKIP MEP to represent the good folk of the East Midlands in the Euro-Parliament in a blaze of self-made glory almost four years ago, but it's proved to be all bluster.

I've only met Kilroy once and it was an unpleasant experience. Our paths crossed in Northampton on the night the votes in the Euro election were counted. As he brushed past us ordinary people - and a queue of MPs and MEPs standing patiently in line to gain entry to the count - he demonstrated all his legendary rudeness and arrogance.

Of course, Kilroy soon fell out with UKIP when his coup to become its Leader collapsed in farce. So he formed his own party and looked around for a target seat to launch his bid to return to Westminster.

He picked on Erewash in Derbyshire, but Kilroy badly misjudged sitting MP Liz Blackman. I know Liz and in contrast to Kilroy, she is one of the quietest, and most hard-working parliamentarians anyone could ever wish to meet.

Liz sensibly let Kilroy grab the headlines while she continued doing what she does best - working hard for her constituents.

Far from beating Liz, she actually increased her majority and Kilroy was suitably humiliated. For me, the Erewash result was the sweetest of the night.

Let's hope Kilroy doesn't choke on his wombat testicles...eh?